Dealing with Aloneness or Loneliness and Finding Comfort in Scripture

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Loneliness and aloneness are major problems for many people, in a variety of circumstances, at all times. They have only been exacerbated in the pandemic, but Jesus reminds us that we are not alone and that God will not forsake us.

The types of loneliness and aloneness

Loneliness and aloneness are two different things, but they can also occur at the same time.

Aloneness is when one is isolated. They might be living alone, isolated and working alone or could be a prisoner in solitary confinement, as well as a number of other scenarios. These people can also suffer from loneliness.

There are several different types of loneliness one can experience, according to Psychology Today. Here are a few of the most common:

1. No significant other or romantic connection

The loss of a partner or the fact that one doesn’t have a significant other or a love interest can create loneliness. There are also situations where one does have a partner, but there is no connection, leading to a feeling of loneliness for that partner.

2. Lack of adequate friendship

Friends and family can help us fill the gap of aloneness and/or remove feelings of loneliness. However, if such friendships are very surface, we can still feel lonely. Another issue can be that even if we have a lot of family or friends, sometimes they can be very busy with their own lives or have moved into other phases of their lives and have little time for us. We feel lonely because we cannot make a meaningful connection with anyone, especially when we need it.

3. New situations

People also experience loneliness in new, unfamiliar situations. This can be when moving to a new area, enrolling at a new school, or starting a new job. Because they have no or few connections, they experience loneliness.

4. Feeling like an outsider

Some people, even when they have the presence of other people in their lives, experience feelings that they are somehow different, disconnected, don’t fit in or feel like an outsider, which leads to feelings of loneliness.

5. Lack of pets at home

Sometimes people fill the hole of loneliness or aloneness from not having a human connection by having some type of pet. But when they don’t have a pet to care for either, especially those that have a strong connection with having an animal in their lives, this leads to another type of loneliness.

Finding strength in the Scriptures for loneliness and aloneness

“Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.'”

–Genesis 2:18

From the very beginning, God knew aloneness and loneliness would be a problem for humankind. After creating the first man, Adam, God created a companion, the first woman, called Eve.

But God also wanted humans to know that they are never alone. That He is always with them.

“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

–Isaiah 41:10

God knew many things would challenge humans in life. Through His prophets, God encouraged us that, no matter what happens, He is always watching over us.

“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”

–Deuteronomy 31:6

For the purpose of watching over us, God has assigned Guardian Angels to each human being.

“For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways.”

–Psalm 91:11

God does not want us to live a life of fear, and this is why he reminds us that we are not alone. Our connection to God is through prayer, and it is simply something we must do consistently to maintain a relationship.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.”

–Philippians 4:6

A friend in Jesus

“Teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. ‘And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.'”

–Matthew 28:20

God’s son, Jesus Christ, who is also God in the flesh, preached the same message to His disciples that God said through His prophets – we are never alone.

When you feel lonely, that is the time to draw closer to God.

“Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.”

James 4:8a

Use your alone time to pray. Dedicate yourself to God, seek him, and he will fulfill your needs.

Jesus instructed:

“But when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.”

–Matthew 6:6

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

– Matthew 6:33

When we feel that we are alone and have no friends, we need to remember that we have a friend in Jesus Christ, who is always with us, the one true friend who will never let us down or abandon us and always has time for us.

This idea was expressed in What a Friend We Have in Jesus, a poem originally written by preacher Joseph M. Scriven in 1855, that later became a famous Christian hymn composed by Charles Crozat Converse in 1868 and William Bolcom composed a setting of the hymn.